Honours grad supervise grass cutting

Read this from a forum I frequent sometimes. Not linking to the actual posts in the forum cos I am not promoting the forum and also cos I dun really like that forum.

The thread starter is some one with a honors degree whose core job responsibilities is supervising grass cutting.

Frankly, SO was in a similar position. And now he is senior management! So he's probably the boss of the boss of the boss of someone like thread starter.

And SO has been in the job for over 14 years. And he has only low class honors. Oops! Lower class honors.

Frankly, the TS is a bit pathetic.

Sometimes it depends on one's perspectives. Whether one sees the job as a challenge or a chore. For example, if the boss gives you a project, do you whine "Gosh, more work, more overtime!!" or do you see it as a opportunity to learn something new or that the project is given to you cos the boss thinks you can do it well?

Figure it out.



I got more to say about this when I am not sick, so come back a few days later....


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Wetcalamari

Mar 4 2009, 07:43 AM

I graduated from NUS with an honors degree in 2003, and did some early work in a ministry. It was a typical admin job, preparing reports, writing minutes, etc. that didn't develop really useful professional skills.

Currently for the past 3 years I have been working in a stat board, where I .... supervise grasscutting everyday. It's a core duty. I make sure grasscutters leave grass no longer than 2 cm tall, and also ensure they empty rubbish bins daily. Needless to say, you don't need an honors degree for this. So for the past 3 years I haven't developed useful skills that are sought after in any company at all.

The thing is, I'm getting old, and with this lack of professional skills (i only have admin experience) it is very very hard to get a job that is not entry level. Most of my friends are already managers and directors, and I'm still supervising grasscutting.

What is the way out?

And do private sector jobs place more emphasis on developing useful skills in people? In my jobs so far the courses I get sent for are very generic, like 'handling difficult people', 'speed reading', 'national education', 'being a good wits suggestor', etc.

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Mar 4 2009, 07:04 PM

That's the problem. Whenever I tell people I supervise grasscutting the immediate reaction is to laugh at me, thinking I'm joking. But when they realize I'm serious they cannot believe it.

The thing is, I'm also not being developed in any useful way here,. so I don't have skills that other companies want. I was recently sent for a course in.. operating a crane! This kind of stuff is done by foreign workers and I, with an honors degree, am doing it now. It's not those PSA-type cranes. It's that small bucket thing behind a truck.

So some might say, at least it's a useful skill. Yes, if I want to be a laborer. But which company wants to pay honors degree holder pay to a laborer?

And so we have an incredible paradox here.

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Mar 5 2009, 08:14 AM

Actually, I had been looking for a new job since my 2nd week there. I sent out more than 30 applications in 2008 and only got called for 2 interviews. I realized the job sucked when on day 1 I was in the blazing sun for 5 hours. 1 month later it was still the same... 1 year later too. And it's been the same almost everyday since.

So far for 2009 I've sent out 10 applications so far, only 1 interview as of now.

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Mar 5 2009, 08:20 AM

Anyway my degree is in biology. 2nd class upper.

The rest of the people in my workplace all have diplomas in horticulture.
But the bosses didn't tell me that when I applied.

In fact the interview for my job was so difficult, you'd think it was some kind of elite position. Did 2 interviews for other positions in the same organization, didn't get past the first interview. Then months later got this interview, was interrogated about all my skills for more than an hour, spoke about my IT project management, my background in the quasi-medical field from my previous jobs, etc.

And now I supervise grasscutting and listen to complaints about leaves falling into peoples houses, cats from the wild going into their house, this tree too tall, grass too long, that tree ugly, "i don't like the color of this tree you planted", etc.

Naturally this is not my place.

NTU Stabbing

I was discussing this with SO.

What a waste of a young life? What happened to make a maths genius go bonkers?

Frankly, if I was him, and I really want vengeance or something, I would have stabbed the other person a few more times and deeper, since after all, I would be dead a few mins later, by suicide, by jumping.

I was nearly there and thus I understand the feeling of almost losing everything in life.

Maybe that's what he felt? That his life was over? That desperation? That loss? That drove him over the edge?

I am no psycho but there were times I really feel like stabbing someone. That great was my rage.

But that was when I was younger and angrier. Some years back.

These days, very few things can ruffle my feathers to the extend that I would want to kill someone.

I suppose that age mellows a person.

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Channel News Asia
2 Mar 2009

Singapore's NTU stabbing incident leaves one dead and another injured

SINGAPORE: A final-year engineering student at the Nanyang Technological University (NTU) jumped from a campus block after stabbing a professor on Monday morning.

The professor was in his office at the engineering faculty when the student stabbed him in the back with a knife, leaving him injured.

After stabbing the professor, the male student - who was in his 20s - slit his wrists and jumped off a five-storey building.

Police said they received a call about the incident at 10.35am, and arrived to find the student dead at the bottom of the engineering block.

Eyewitnesses had also told Channel NewsAsia that a person had been stabbed, and that a student, believed to be an Indonesian-Chinese had slit his wrists before jumping off a building.

An NTU spokesman later confirmed that a final year student from the School of Electrical and Electronics Engineering was involved in the stabbing.

It, however, did not name the two people involved, and only said that their next-of-kin had been notified.

The student is said to be 21-year-old David Hartanto Widjaja and the professor is believed to be Chan Kap Luk, who was left with injuries on his back and arm.

Widjaja was a former president of the NTU Electronic Sports Club.

Professor Chan, a Singaporean in his 40s, was sent to the National University Hospital for treatment and is said to be in a stable condition.

The professor has been with NTU's School of Electrical and Electronic Engineering since June 1992.

Professor Chan, who is Deputy Director of the Biomedical Engineering Research Centre at NTU, is said to have been the supervisor of the student in a project.

NTU's president, Su Guaning, pledged to help the families of the professor and student and has mobilised its counselling professionals to help. He also said the matter will be investigated thoroughly.

"The university is deeply shocked and saddened by what has happened... The university community will rally together at this difficult time and do our utmost to help the student's family, the professor and his family, and those traumatised by the incident," added Dr Su.

Speaking to the media at the NUH in the evening, Dr Su said Professor Chan might be discharged in a few days. The stab wound in the professor's back was "deep" but no vital organs were injured. His arm was also not "too badly hurt".

It is understood that at the time of the incident, Widjaja was discussing his final-year project with Professor Chan, as he had difficulty obtaining a pass grade.

Dr Su said Widjaja was a "very good student" whose grades had slipped recently, but he was still considered above average. He said Professor Chan had expressed regret that he could not help his student earlier.

The NTU president said he hopes to prevent such an incident from happening again. "I think it's an overall pastoral care system that is necessary. We've already set up such a thing, with the Student Affairs Office, many counsellors keeping an eye on students with problems.

"Unfortunately, the student never showed that he had problems. ... We would like to review the system to see how we can pick out better students who have such problems, even if they don't communicate with others."

- 938LIVE/CNA/sf/ir

Love and Madness

Read this somewhere online and found it to be somewhat interesting.

So sharing it here....And of course it's NOT real!

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A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on it for the first time, virtues and vices floated around and were bored, not knowing what to do.

One day, all the vices and virtues were gathered together and were more bored than ever.

Suddenly, Ingenious came up with an idea: "Let's play hide and seek!"

All of them liked the idea and immediately Madness shouted: "I want to count, I want to count!"

And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek Madness, all the others agreed.

Madness leaned against a tree and started to count: "One, two, three..."

As Madness counted, the vices and virtues went hiding.

Tenderness hung itself on the horn of the moon, Treason hid in a pile of garbage. Fondness curled up between the clouds and Passion went to the centre of the earth.

Lie said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake, whilst Avarice entered a sack that he ended up breaking.

And Madness continued to count: "...seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."

By this time, all the vices and virtues were already hidden - except Love.

For undecided as Love is, he could not decide where to hide. And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide Love.

Madness: "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..."

Just when Madness got to one hundred, Love jumped into a rose bush where he hid. And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

As Madness turned around, Laziness was the first to be found, because Laziness had no energy to hide. Then he spotted Tenderness in the horn of the moon, Lie at the bottom of the lake and Passion at the centre of the earth.

One by one, Madness found them all - except Love.

Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.

Envious of Love, Envy whispered to Madness: "You only need to find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush." Madness grabbed a wooden pitchfork and stabbed wildly at the rosebush.

Madness stabbed and stabbed until a heartbreaking cry made him stop.

Love appeared from the rose bush, covering his face with his hands.Between his fingers ran two trickles of blood from his eyes.

Madness, so anxious to find Love, had stabbed out Love's eyes with a pitchfork.

"What have I done! What have I done!" Madness shouted.

"I have left you blind! How can I repair it?" And Love answered: "You cannot repair my eyes. But if you want to do something for me, you can be my guide."

And so it came about that from that day on, Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness.

My first FUCK

Blogging about Jade Seah and her "Fuck" word on TV, reminded me of my first fuck.

Nope, you dirty minded. Not my first physical copulation act. But the very first time I heard and learnt the word "Fuck".

I was in primary 4 or 5 then. I was at this lift void deck with my classmate, Rodney C, who was also my neighbour, when I asked him to teach me some english vulgar words.

Rodney C was this Eurasian kid who lived upstairs. His dad was some English dude and his mom was this chinese dance hostess or something. Anyway, she got pregnant, he didn't want the baby and left her.

And so Rodney ended up living in his aunt's place, which is one floor up from our home.

Having an eurasian classmate at that time in school was a very big deal. He was very outspoken, daring and frank. I remembered that the teachers was so impressed with having this Caucasian looking eurasian boy in their school, that by the first week , they had him reading passages from a book on stage. Once a week for a month!

Anyway, he was this very playful and mischievous kid. And sometimes, we would walked home from school together.

We were just hanging around one day, waiting for the lift when I asked him to teach me some English vulgarities. And he said ok.... One word is "Fuck"

I was like, "What's Fuck"? I couldn't even pronounce it properly then.

Are you kidding me? Is fuck a real dirty word?

Yeah, he told me. Adults used it often.

I was like ...okay...but what did it mean? He didn't or couldn't explain the term to me at that time.

I did not used the "Fuck" word until many years later, but it was Rodney C who taught me my first "Fuck".

Anyway, he stayed around for about 2-3 years. By then, his mother had found an English man who was willing to marry her and locate her and her son to UK.

I remembered that day, I bid farewell to Rodney C as he waited for the taxi to take him to the airport. We were still both kids, so there was no teary goodbyes or whatever. It was like, okay...Goodbye...good life...hope to see you again.

We never exchanged contacts numbers or addresses.

A few years later, about 5?, I met him again as he came back to Singapore for a visit. But too much time had passed. It was very awkward and sort of intimidating. Sitting there talking to him was like talking to a stranger, not some childhood friend.

We chatted a bit. I remembered asking if he faced racism in UK. And he said yes. There were some guys who threw stones at him and called him a chink and asked him to go back home to China!

The thing was that when he was a boy, he was a really Caucasian looking kid. But as he grew older, he was like a bit more asian looking.

Anyway, we were in our late teens then and again we did not exchange any contacts after that meeting.

Some time later, I found out from his aunt, that he gotten married at 21. I even saw his wedding photos. But sadly, the marriage did not really last. A few years later, they got divorced.

I suppose that by now, he would have gotten married again and probably have kids of his own.

Many years back, I heard that he only got 1 or 2 passes in his "O" levels and was working as some sort of low end warehouse or delivery job.

Anyway, sometimes, I wondered about Rodney C, the boy who taught me "Fuck", curious about his life and how's he's been doing.

I suppose I could still get his address in UK. My mother are still friends with his aunt.

But something is holding me back. What's the point? It has been years and years and even if we made contact, we would have nothing in common and nothing to talk about.

Rodney C, the boy who taught me "Fuck". Thinking back, I dun know why memories of that day were so vivid. Like it happened some weeks ago and not years and years old.

Anyway, when 's your first fuck?

Same birthdate, different destiny

I just watched a TV documentary "Birthday Pals". This particular episode showed 2 people sharing the same birth date, but as they were born in different countries, their lifestyle and destiny are starkly differently.

Ly Long was a child born in Cambodia. He lived in a small 5m by 2m illegal log cabin by the river with his widowed mother and 4 other younger siblings. He had to collect rubbish for recycling to survive since he was 8 years old. Working for 10 hours daily, he would exchange the trash collected for about US$0.50, which he would give to his mother to subsidize family expenses.

His father, a drunk who died some years back was a violent man who used to beat his children and wife.

Contrast that with a local girl here who was born on the same day. She came from a well-off family, is able to afford music lessons, a laptop and even vacations to Japan.

Her family loves her and is able to give her most of what she wants. And yah, she lives in landed property.

Happiness encompasses totally different meanings for different people. To him, happiness means 3 full meals a day and a roof over his head.

They may be born on the same day, but they have totally different destiny.

It could happen to either of us. Any one of us could be born in a poorer, less developed country, living in poverty. Most times, it's not really our choice as to the families we are born into.

Some of us are luckier than others. Some people are born into wealth, live in private landed property, have maids, cars etc.

Others have to work hard just for their daily meals and a decent roof over their head.

I am not considered well off. I am just okay average. I dun have a maid, no credit card of my own, no car, no property of my own. I also dun own any branded clothes, shoes, bag, luggage, watch or jewelery. And I have never taken a luxury vacation that cost more than $1000.

Some years back, I came to realise that all these materialistic things are fleeting, we cannot bring these things forward when we die. Hence, I dropped out of the corporate rat race, to engage in a simpler and more fulfilling lifestyle.

I do not have to worry about my meals and have a decent roof over my head. And for that I am happy and grateful. Not to mention peaceful. And I dun take things and people for granted.

Sometimes, simplicity is really a form of happiness.

Anyway, to learn more about Ly Long, read how he overcame odds from dump yard to school yard.

And to help children like Ly Long, visit Worldvision and sponsor a child.

Anyone can become a child sponsor for $45 per month and through this monthly donation, World Vision ensures that your sponsored child and his/her family receives the following benefits: Food and Agriculture, Clean Water, Healthcare, Education and Literacy, Economic Development.

Love is

Saw this on an episode of "Close to Home".
Touching but kinda of mushy.

It is also commonly used as wedding vows.

1 Corinthians (NRSV)

Love is patient;
love is kind;
love is not envious or boastful
or arrogant or rude.

It does not insist on its own way;
it is not irritable or resentful;
it does not rejoice in wrongdoing,
but rejoices in the truth.

It bears all things,
believes all things,
hopes all things,
endures all things.

Love never ends.
But as for prophecies,
they will come to an end;
as for tongues,
they will cease;
as for knowledge,
it will come to an end.

For we know only in part,
and we prophesy only in part;
But when the complete comes,
the partial will come to an end.

When I was a child,
I spoke like a child,
I thought like a child,
I reasoned like a child;
when I became an adult,
I put an end to childish ways.

For now we see in a mirror, dimly,
but then we will see face to face.
Now I know only in part;
then I will know fully,
even as I have been fully known.

And now faith, hope, and love abide,
these three;
and the greatest of these is love.

Monks and Hair

Why must monks shave their hair?

Monks are to be indifferent to worldly temptations. So what do they have to keep their hair?
The body is only a shell. A bald head is a departure from having too much love for your body.

Buddha says think not of yourself, humans, the masses or the immortals. Everything around us is an illusion. Trouble comes with being oversensitive.

One is too sensitive about how people look at oneself, sensitive about whether one looks good, sensitive about too many matters and things.

Trouble follows only when one's mind is distracted. Those who know how to let go will have less problems.

Passing the Dream

When women become mothers. their life priorities change.

I was watching this TV show on celebrities mothers. Yeah I watched all kind of trashy shows. I taped such shows and practically fast forward them. So out of 30 mins, I would watch about 10 mins real time.

Well, the celebrity mum being interviewed was DS. She was a former neighbour of mine when I was living in Newton. She and her boyfriend (now husband) JL were living a few floors up. We had seen them around but we never spoke.

JL her boyfriend was a rather famous and hunky actor turned banker when he was at the prime of his career. We met JL on our very first day of moving in. We were driving in with our truckful of stuff, in our dirty clothes, sweating and smelling like pigs and who came to "greet" us at the carpark but JL. We were speechless but if the area was good enough for celebrities, it should be good enough for us.

As for DS, she was a actress turned TV host(ess)/journalist. We met her a few times at the lift lobby, and even shared the lift, sometimes alone, sometimes with her dog, "Pepper". We never spoke to one another, cos both SO and I were rather shy. Personally I dun feel we should fawn over celebrities. They are also humans after all. As for SO, it's a different case. Every time, he see a celebrity, he would whisper their name, rather loudly. Yeah...it's pretty embarrassing, though I am indifferent to them.

Anyway, on the show, DS, who was no longer in show business after the birth of her son, but now running her own PR company, said that she used to be very ambitious. She wanted to be at the top of her field (which she did) and even wanted to travel to Hong Kong or China to become a top journalist there. But after the birth of her son, everything changed. Her son is now her top priority. As for her ambitions and dreams, her children can do that for her. She is passing the dream.

When women give birth, their life change. Everything is now about their children. They, the women, dun exist any more. Self does not exist. Only their next generation. Their maternal instincts took over.

I told SO before, the female species can be so "pitiful" and sacrificial at times. For the first 15 years of their lives, they live for their parents. The next 10 to 15 years, some would live for themselves. But then if they got married and have children, the next decades till they die belong to their children. Whatever dreams, ambitions, aspirations they have now are now passed on to their children, their next generations, their clones.

Unless of course, you dun get married or dun have children, only then would you have to live out your own dreams, cos there are no one to pass them to.

Passing the dream is thus something only mothers would understand. And one would never know or understand unless one become a mother. And yet, mothers find all these sacrifices so worthwhile.

How to deal with mad barking dog

The way to deal with a mad barking dog is to just let it bark. When it grows tired of barking, it will stop. The fact that a barking dog is abusive shows he lacked composure. In the end, the one to lose out is him.

Barking dogs dun bite. Biting dogs dun bark!

P.S. I am not really talking about dogs.

Heaven and Hell

Where there is Heaven, there is Hell.
Where there is Good, there is Evil.

I came across this paragraph from a book, "The Thieves of Heaven" by Richard Doetsch, page 301.

Do u believe in Heaven?
Then why is it so hard to believe in Hell? They are just opposite sides of the same coin.

Hell is real and it is eternal. Hell is not some picture on the wall., some actor in a movie. (Satan) is not just a cloven-footed beast with horns.

Man has envisioned Satan and created Hell with his own thoughts: Dante's inferno, the nine circles of Hell, fire, and brimstone - they are all bullshit. That is all man's imagination.

As we cannot hope to comprehend the beauty and salvation of Heaven, we cannot hope to comprehend the torment and agony of Hell. It is dark, unrelenting, and viciously evil.

Hell is is undeserving if any name. You have no concept of pure evil but you will........Before we are through, you will know better than any man who walks this Earth what true evil is.

Plato's Cave

"Wicker" by Kevin Guilfoile
Page 211

Plato believed an idea was the idea state of being.

When a carpenter conceives of a table in his mind, it is perfect. His conception of the table is the real table. When he actually planes the wood and saws the legs and assembles it, when he crafts it into something we can see ad we can touch, the actual table is only a representation of the idea, an imperfect imitation.

He said that our experience is like that of a man in a cave, watching shadows projected on the wall from an unknown source. The shadows we see are only imperfect representations of the real human beings.

When Grandma died

I am still thinking of Daniel. And I dun know why.

To think of it, I never did cry for Daniel. I remembered I went into a state of shock when I flipped open the papers 2 years back and just saw his obituary staring back at me. I did not shed a tear for Daniel then or even now. Should I?

When my maternal grandma died, 4 or 5 years back, I was not as affected then or grieved as I was affected by Daniel's death. Maybe grandma and I never shared a single tender warm moment together.

I recalled my mother leaving me a message on my pager....Grandma died, please come to the funeral.

At that time, I was starting work at a new job, a dot.com and was only working 3 days a week initially. I remembered telling my boss then...sorry I can't come in the rest of the week and maybe next week as well cos my grandma just died.

My then boss said..."I am so sorry. Condolences. Take your time and return to work when u are ready."

And i was pretty sure my responses was," oh...it's all right anyway, we were not that close so I dun really feel so sad."

I did not know why I said that. Maybe that was the way I really felt then and now thinking back...seems a tad bit too heartless and unfilial??

Well, Grandma was just ..... grandma, a woman who gave birth to my mother. We used to visit her every Wednesday cos that was the day my mother had her off day from work. And every single time without fail, my mother would buy a duck, which she would cook in soya sauce. And after giving my grandma one third of the duck, would bring the rest back home. (I am unable to eat duck meat now cos I got gout. As SO said, I had eaten all the ducks I could in my life time. Karma!)

My grandpa died in his 60s?? leaving grandma who was then in her 30s?? to bring up her brood of children. There was 8 of them, 5 girls and 3 boys.

I think Grandma probably came from a rich family background. She simply had no idea of working. Other widows probably have to toll and toil to bring up so many kids, but I dun think she actually worked a single day to support her children. Her children, other than my mother who was the youngest, had minimal education....Maybe up to primary school education? My mother was lucky that she managed to scrap through 3 years of her high school education.

Anyway, most of my grandma's children worked various jobs to support her family.

Grandma and I never really had a conversation directly. And i mean NEVER! At least, not to my recollection. I mean we spoke the same language and dialect and understand each other perfectly but then there was never a common topic between us. To her, I was probably just the son of her youngest daughter, who visited every week.

Thinking of it now, I just realised that grandma and I never sat down for a meal together. And I mean NEVER. I have never eaten with any of my maternal relatives other than my mother. Odd and very strange. I mean I have definitely seen her eat and she has seen me ate but we have never actually share a meal ...lunch or dinner together.

I was telling SO this and SO admitted it was strange.....but he said ...but then your family is strange. And I suppose that by never sharing a meal together means Grandma and I never bonded at all. But now that's history and there 's nothing I could do any more.

When Grandma reached her 60s??, she contracted diabetes. By then, I have not visited her much. Reaching teenage years by then, I no longer followed my mother as she went on her weekly trips home. I was busy with school, life and stuff. I suppose I never did see her much after becoming a teenager. I was just too busy growing up.

Grandma was hospitalized when I was in my early adulthood...when I was on my first job. I remembered then that her both her legs were amputated in a operation. But she was still very much aware and not at all senile. She couldeven recognized me even though she had not seen me for years. And she was so in her element, that she even remembered clearly what the doctor said about the next appointment as he wheeled her out of the operation table. We were all expecting her to be groggy and dizzy from the operation and yet there she was ....so alert.

I visited her once or twice at the hospital and then she was discharged. And that was the last time I ever saw her again.

I did not keep track of her whereabouts after that and I really have no idea where she lived then. Was she staying in the old family place or had she moved in with her youngest son? Frankly, I dun know. I never visited her. Maybe I just did not thought of visiting her at all. Though my mother did still go on her weekly trips.I cannot seemed to remember much about myself or my activities during that phase of life. But it was not as if I dun care. I really did but I just dun know what to do. Or what I had done then.

Anyway, I received news of her funeral some years later and went to her wake.
By then I had moved out and living apart from my immediate family.

At the funeral wake, there were so many relatives that I have not seen for a long time and relatives that I did not even know even existed. The whole wake lasted 3 days and she was given a catholic funeral ...no doubt...Arranged by my mother.

My grandma was not an educated woman and I dun think she has nary a concept of catholism or Christianity. But on her deathbed, she was baptized and was even given the name "Maria".

I can still remembered one of my older cousins, saying...when did granma become "Maria" and then he chuckled. Frankly, I also found that amusing. I meant...just because one is baptized does not necessary mean one is given passage to heaven. U have to believe. Really believe in the salvation of Christ....otherwise it is just death rites by catholism.

When she was cremated, some of my female relatives cried. I dun think my mother wept though. I did not see that then. But then either did I. Frankly, I did not exactly feel a loss. After all, she had lived a full rich life. And she died without complaints and regrets. And she died ..OLD...she was in her 80s? or was it 90s?

A few days after the funeral, I accompanied my mother to collect grandma's ashes. There were only the 2 of us. I dun know why there were only 2 of us. Anyway, my mother brought me to this terrace place..some sort of church.. which seemed like some place of catholic worship place or someone's home. There we were brought underground to a basement where it seems there are so many urns around. Well....the caretaker? asked us to choose a empty slot..

My mother couldn't make up her mind and so I just picked a slot..with numbers 8 ..which I now cannot remembered.

And we left grandma's ashes there.

And I never went back there since. And I dun know whether my mother does. Frankly, now I dun think I could even remember the exact location of the place either.

I did not feel sad for grandma, the way I felt for Daniel. Maybe Daniel died young...in the prime of his life...whereas Grandma died old...she lived her full life. I meant ..could she have gone any further??? She had her legs cut off, she was sick and old.

And personally to me, she's more like my mother's friend than my grandma...whom I hardly know. Whom I met a many times when I was a child. There did not seemed to be any blood bond intimacy between us. She's just grandma in name. The mother of my mother in blood.

I dun feel any closer to Daniel though. After I left the company, we did not keep in touch. Yet I was really haunted by his death. Maybe it was because he was kind to me. Once, twice ..many times and I never had the opportunity to tell him thank you.

Well....dun ask...I dun know. I am funny that way!