Breaking ties with the bitch who birth me!

This post is not appropriate for those who are filial or think they are filial. If you are anything of the above, please DO NOT read on.

If you read on, it implies that you are in agreement with my terms and conditions. That you would not judge or critise my thinkings and actions. You can keep them to yourselves.

I have disallowed any comments for this post (or maybe any other posts) cos I simply dun give a crap to anyone's feedback or whatever comments to this post.

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I am still feeling tired but better than what I felt earlier this week.

And then came the life drama of the month.

As usual, initiated by my very drama mama or better known to me as the BITCH who birthed me.

To be completed

Becoming a recluse

I had just read a blog in which the author mentioned a friend's facebook status.

The thing that struck me was this...that he was
tired of people in general... that he's just feeling more and more reclusive, and that the less he go out and interact with people, the more relax and peaceful he'll feel...

Gosh, I felt the same way too.

I am just so tired of people. All sorts of people. Strangers and even people I know.

And I cannot help it!

I am some sort of a recluse. It has been ages since I have met up with some one I know, besides SO.

But recently, I am plagued with anxiety when I have to interact with anyone else. Like the supermarket cashier or those hawkers that sells rice or noodles.

Frankly, I preferred to hole up at home with my TV, my mobile phone and my laptop.

Everything else is simply redundant to me.

If SO were to die before me, I think I would probably end up like those elderly who lived alone and died alone, unknown.

That is my plight, my status.

Deleted Rant by Ms LL

The below is a post by Ms LL, a local actress and now host of a reality documentary.

The other day, I was reading her blog and came across this gem of a post. She was ranting about some corporate fellow she encountered while filming the documentary.

Frankly, I know the post would not last, cos it was too vocal and fiery. Like her. Our dear Ms LL.

I would have to say I rather admired her passion in work. I mean no one can rant like that without some passion in her work attitude.

Personally, for me, if something similar were to happen to me, I would probably just yawn right through. I am passionate but just NOT that passionate.

So rather than let the post fade into oblivion which would be a great pity, I have reproduced the entire post from cache.

Enjoy!

(Names have been changed to avoid any embarrassment.)



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potentially offensive rant

Warning: The following includes a potentially offensive rant. It is the opinion of ONE person in the media. It might not reflect anyone else's even though there is truth in it. Read at your own risk.

The premise of UA (documentary Ms LL is hosting) is a good one - to provide viewers a glimpse to places previously concealed. No topic is taboo and no information privileged. That's what I thought I signed up for anyway. Unfortunately, I find that sometimes it seems more like a sanitized corporate video full of PR ho-hums than a look behind closed doors. Red tape, saving face, needing to protray what is deemed right and good versus what is accurate... reasons are aplenty. Not right nor wrong, just different outlooks. And my stance as a host is constant: What makes for good viewing? What does my viewer want to see?

(1) Intelligence.

I for one loathe the usual self-explanatory, imbecilic set ups common in our local shows. Eg. host enters shop and says "I am entering the shop". Actor in drama unleashes a livid tirade and the other actor (who obviously just ingested some stupid pills) asks "Is he angry?" Don't insult the viewers' intelligence please.

(2) Realness.

Haven't you seen enough of contrived, over-done flamboyance on telly? Keep it real dawg. Often the success of any script, show, acting is exacting the conveying what is not said.

(3) Dignity.

Because the tv biz (including the actor's job) is so reliant on sponsors etc, the station/production house/producer/actor often find themselves in the compromising position right below somebody else's ass. This can result in horrific PR plugs (tie in with gagging contrivance) and just something that is so not true.

And all the above points, ultimately, to objectively showing things as it is. It's there. Don't pretend it's not. Don't sugar coat it. Don't burden it with notions of superstition, righteousness, negativity etc. It is what it is.

So I am going on about it primarily because I feel bad. The ratings for UA has been stellar. Our first ep did better than the Finals of SI (local star search show for singers) and second ep even better! If the ratings were otherwise, I don't think I'll feel this sense of having jibbed the viewers. Some righteous part of me suffers the idea that you are watching a show that promises to deliver but doesn't.

And I particularly feel this way because we've been suffering a few miserable days at the shipyard. It is common to be accompanied by the reps from the corp office to ensure that things are ok and that there is no misrepresentation on our side about them (you know how things can be twisted in the media..) but my experience shooting there has been sickening. I shall be quick to qualify that I am voicing my personal opinions. Not the production company's, not the station's etc. They have their hands tied. I don't. Which leaves me free to opine.

Anyway, you know what shipyards are like - humungus machineries, inconceivably heavy loads, non-stop welding, 4-ton metal sheets, intense heat, 300,000 ton ships , great heights and great depths .. an invitation to accidents basically. I had to sit through 30 minutes of Safety Induction when I first arrived so I'm guessing I can't be far wrong. We were shown pictures of nails embedded in eyeballs (because the worker didn't wear his goggles), fingers lobbed off and broken thigh bones.. Zero Incidents is what they're aiming for and all you see everywhere are Safety signs. I was impressed to begin with - the meticulous design of a shipyard. The care of the workers for safety. I met with some wonderful individuals who are knowledgeable and passionate, most of all completely affable. So it was great until Mr Corp Com, our appendage throughout the entire shoot, appeared to vehemently insist that danger and accidents do not exist in a shipyard. He continued to shove it down our throats, and went so far as to dictating how and what to say and shoot. Which is 'safety this safety that because our shipyard is just so safe and excellent' and all that masterbatory propaganda.

I know it's their perogative what they want said or not. And they do have a company to protect. But this really crosses the line into disrespect, especially when there was a clear threat that any dissatisfaction on their part will directly impact the production company's next project with them. And while some aspects of their excellence and safety is true, the more glaring truth is the cover ups they are commiting. Big time gross.

So, is the shipyard interesting? Yes .. when we're able to find aspects that appeal. But certainly not when it is dictated for us what we are supposed to find interesting. With a gun to our heads to boot. I felt sorry for the director. He had to contend with an office schmuck directing his show.

Anyhow. I've had my catharsis.

Good news. Remember that meeting I had at MC (Media company that broadcast UN) ? I'd mentioned to the spectacular team there that some of the great materials we've shot are distressingly dumped on the cutting room floor. And because there has been such positive reviews and feedback from everyone of you (thanks guys), they realised that we might be able to post some of the censored bits online for you. So check out the MC site (I'll provide a link) - Ep 1's embalming bits are there.

I hope you realise the voice YOU have. You can try to convince the station what you might want to watch in the forum etc. Follow the civil defence to scenes of suicides and watch them scoop up scattered brain matter? What happens when an offender is caned? Who is the hangman at the prison? There is a plethora of topics I find interesting but am told that it is too far out. The production company can't do much either. Maybe you the viewer can :)

Posted by LL at 3/04/2009 09:57:00 PM

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LL said...

I was told I should withdraw it as it could unleash a floodgate of negative stuff. I thought about it and figured that it didn't make much of a difference to me, and since it mattered so much to someone else, I could do them the favor of removing it.

March 9, 2009 10:44 PM

Honours grad supervise grass cutting

Read this from a forum I frequent sometimes. Not linking to the actual posts in the forum cos I am not promoting the forum and also cos I dun really like that forum.

The thread starter is some one with a honors degree whose core job responsibilities is supervising grass cutting.

Frankly, SO was in a similar position. And now he is senior management! So he's probably the boss of the boss of the boss of someone like thread starter.

And SO has been in the job for over 14 years. And he has only low class honors. Oops! Lower class honors.

Frankly, the TS is a bit pathetic.

Sometimes it depends on one's perspectives. Whether one sees the job as a challenge or a chore. For example, if the boss gives you a project, do you whine "Gosh, more work, more overtime!!" or do you see it as a opportunity to learn something new or that the project is given to you cos the boss thinks you can do it well?

Figure it out.



I got more to say about this when I am not sick, so come back a few days later....


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Wetcalamari

Mar 4 2009, 07:43 AM

I graduated from NUS with an honors degree in 2003, and did some early work in a ministry. It was a typical admin job, preparing reports, writing minutes, etc. that didn't develop really useful professional skills.

Currently for the past 3 years I have been working in a stat board, where I .... supervise grasscutting everyday. It's a core duty. I make sure grasscutters leave grass no longer than 2 cm tall, and also ensure they empty rubbish bins daily. Needless to say, you don't need an honors degree for this. So for the past 3 years I haven't developed useful skills that are sought after in any company at all.

The thing is, I'm getting old, and with this lack of professional skills (i only have admin experience) it is very very hard to get a job that is not entry level. Most of my friends are already managers and directors, and I'm still supervising grasscutting.

What is the way out?

And do private sector jobs place more emphasis on developing useful skills in people? In my jobs so far the courses I get sent for are very generic, like 'handling difficult people', 'speed reading', 'national education', 'being a good wits suggestor', etc.

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Mar 4 2009, 07:04 PM

That's the problem. Whenever I tell people I supervise grasscutting the immediate reaction is to laugh at me, thinking I'm joking. But when they realize I'm serious they cannot believe it.

The thing is, I'm also not being developed in any useful way here,. so I don't have skills that other companies want. I was recently sent for a course in.. operating a crane! This kind of stuff is done by foreign workers and I, with an honors degree, am doing it now. It's not those PSA-type cranes. It's that small bucket thing behind a truck.

So some might say, at least it's a useful skill. Yes, if I want to be a laborer. But which company wants to pay honors degree holder pay to a laborer?

And so we have an incredible paradox here.

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Mar 5 2009, 08:14 AM

Actually, I had been looking for a new job since my 2nd week there. I sent out more than 30 applications in 2008 and only got called for 2 interviews. I realized the job sucked when on day 1 I was in the blazing sun for 5 hours. 1 month later it was still the same... 1 year later too. And it's been the same almost everyday since.

So far for 2009 I've sent out 10 applications so far, only 1 interview as of now.

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Mar 5 2009, 08:20 AM

Anyway my degree is in biology. 2nd class upper.

The rest of the people in my workplace all have diplomas in horticulture.
But the bosses didn't tell me that when I applied.

In fact the interview for my job was so difficult, you'd think it was some kind of elite position. Did 2 interviews for other positions in the same organization, didn't get past the first interview. Then months later got this interview, was interrogated about all my skills for more than an hour, spoke about my IT project management, my background in the quasi-medical field from my previous jobs, etc.

And now I supervise grasscutting and listen to complaints about leaves falling into peoples houses, cats from the wild going into their house, this tree too tall, grass too long, that tree ugly, "i don't like the color of this tree you planted", etc.

Naturally this is not my place.