Suicidal blogs may not mean suicidal kids

The Sunday Times
5 April 2009

Suicidal blogs may not mean suicidal kids

Parents urged to look for tell-tale symptoms before seeking help
By Nur Dianah Suhaimi

Children and teens blog about just anything, even suicidal thoughts, but this does not necessarily mean they want to kill themselves, say psychiatrists.

Really suicidal children would be withdrawn and display symptoms such as not eating or sleeping well, and refusing to go to school, they say. Thus, they urge parents to look out for the tell-tale signs before calling up for an appointment.

The Institute of Mental Health sees about 2,000 to 3,000 young patients each year. But in each of the past two years, it has been seeing more than 3,000 children and teens, said Dr Daniel Fung, chief of the hospital's department of child and adolescent psychiatry.

Those in private practice are also seeing a spike in child and teenage patients. These numbers do not necessarily mean there has been a spike in mental illnesses among the young, the psychiatrists emphasise.

While greater public awareness and better outreach play a role, other factors include children of busy parents becoming lonelier.

Last week, consultant psychiatrist Brian Yeo wrote in The Straits Times' health supplement, Mind Your Body, that more parents are taking their children to his clinic after reading their troubled blog postings.

'These children mainly write about suicide and, sometimes, even homicide. Their postings can be so scary that their friends will alert their teachers,' he told The Sunday Times.

Psychiatrists explain that it is quite common for children to harbour suicidal thoughts. Dr Fung cited a recent survey on suicidal thinking showing that 30 to 40 per cent of children have had suicidal thoughts at one point or other.

But most of the time, they are not serious about taking their own lives. They are just seeking attention, he said. 'Parents are very busy with work and don't have time to talk to their children. The convenient way out is to send them to a psychiatrist.'

Psychiatrist Ang Yong Guan, who has his own practice, used to see a new child or teen about once a month. Now, he sees a new one every week. He said: 'Most of them have some form of anxiety problem. But many of these cases do not even need psychiatric help. They need their parents' attention.'

The Tinkle Friend children's counselling helpline has also seen a sharp increase in the number of calls it received. Last year, it received over 4,000 calls from children, a four-year high. Said Ms Yap Lee Lan, the helpline's coordinator: 'The majority are lonely... They just want someone to chat with.'

Psychiatrists say that if a child is not really withdrawn or showing tell-tale symptoms, dragging him off to a psychiatrist might further jeopardise parent-child relations.

Said Dr Fung: 'Seeing a psychiatrist should be the last resort. It's better for the parents to talk to their children and find out what the problem is.'

ndianah@sph.com.sg


WHEN TO START WORRYING
Don't panic if your child's blog contains morbid thoughts, say psychiatrists. It could just be that he is trying to get some attention from friends. These are the signs that show a child is really suicidal:

# Not eating and sleeping well

# Refuses to go to school for no reason

# Socially withdrawn and keeps to his room

# Frequently crouches in a foetal position

# Has a habit of punching his fist or banging his head against the wall

# Talks negatively - like saying that life has no meaning - not just in blog postings but in daily conversations with others as well


HELPLINES

# Samaritans of Singapore: 1800-221-4444

# Family Service Centre: 1800-838-0100

# Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019

# Care Corner Mandarin Counselling Centre: 1800-353-5800

# Tinkle Friend: 1800-274-4788

# Touchline (Touch Youth Service): 1800-377-2252